Surgery done. All is well. Sorted.

Current Pain Rating: 0

Another One Bites The Dust

Lester William Polfuss, probably better known to most of you as Les Paul passed away yesterday.

R.I.P Les and ta for everything.

Current Pain Rating: 0

T-7

...................and currently in a Zen like state of calm. It will not last.

A bit hungry too, but not as bad as I was expecting.

Looking forward to headlining at the Blackdown Beer Festival on Friday - yeh, a beer festival and I MUST not drink any of it - hahahaha!

Not a lot else to report really.

Current Pain Rating: 0

MILK!

I have to do a diet before my surgery.
It is thus:

4 pints semi skimmed milk
1 salty drink (like bovril or chicken oxo)
1 sugar free jelly
2 litres of water

Snacks of which I could have three a day but only 1 of each could be
1 salty drink (like bovril or chicken oxo)
1 stick of sugar free gum
1 sugar free jelly

I am a little peeved to note the absence of fillet steak and chips in this list.
Balls.

Current Pain Rating: 0

The Knife! (Again)

Well now, those closest to me already know that I am approaching another run in with the medics. I am not going public with what is going to happen yet - I am not too sure exactly how I feel about letting the world know.

Suffice to say it is MAJOR elective surgery and it will happen (I hope) three weeks from today, as long as they don't close the hospital due to a few people having minor sniffles that is. Now, this is a slightly risky procedure and therefore a wee bit scary - I might not make it back from the theatre, but the odds are an acceptable 1:1500. Hell, I've done things to myself with far worse odds of popping the old clogs than that (admittedly not for quite some time though).

Anyway - in three weeks or so, the pain ratings will reflect what is happening all over my poor aching carcass, not just the hands.

Here's a wee clue for the qualified surgeons amongst you:

Nice huh?

Now, I need to quote Bill Hicks here - Bill came up with something I have been thinking since I was about 17 years old and if I don't make it through this shit I want it as my memorial.

'You know all that money we spend on nuclear weapons and defense each year, trillions of dollars, correct? Instead -- just play with this -- if we spent that money feeding and clothing the poor of the world -- and it would pay for it many times over, not one human being excluded -- we can explore space together, both inner and outer, forever in peace.'

Yep, I'm feeling vulnerable scared and emotional. Again.

Fuck.

Current Pain Rating: 0

International Security and the Amerikkkan Effect

I have just returned from a few days in Europe. A 50th birthday trip to Amsterdam with Mrs. E as it happens. We won't go into the sordid details, suffice to say that my brother suggested there were three things worth doing in the city and asked which I did. A, B and C was the reply. Now, C is a boat trip, the rest? Hell - go figure!

Anyway, the point is that leaving the UK, we were thoroughly searched, had a bottle of mouthwash confiscated, even though there was only 50mls in it (which you could clearly see) and were generally made to feel intimidated by the police officers at customs (at least at Bristol they don't carry automatic weapons like at Stanstead!)

Arriving at Schipol we just walked straight out of the airport - no checks of any kind - it felt very odd!

Whilst resident in the port of Amsterdam, although the police were very evident (we were staying in the red light district) they took a real 'softly softly' approach some even dishing out minor reprimands between tokes from huge spliffs (I kid you not!)

Returning to Schipol we are a little worried about customs as we have bought gifts for the offspring, which include fluids (cherry beer and Absinthe) and a bag of marijuana teabags for the eldest, who likes to keep it nice and organic. So we decide to stash them in the bags and go for it anyway - if they get confiscated, well that's a lesson learned. Guess what? Hardly any security at all apart from a quick wizz through a scanner and a grinning passport officer who is more interested in Cath's surname (MulHOLLAND) than our passports. And not a police officer in sight.

Now, some may call me cynical and some may even think I am misguided, but could this difference in approach to security have anything to do with the UK being a massive target for international terrorism due to having it's collective cock wedged firmly up the festering arsehole of Amerikkka, whilst the gentle Dutch don't do wars and generally have a good time?

Answers on a postcard to the usual address please.

Current Pain Rating: 0

Seething.......still!

A Rant

Last night Catherine and I had a nice early night and watched the programmes about the mighty Island record label. Lots of our fave bands have been on this label and the programmes promised a couple of hours of excellent entertainment for a pair of music junkies. We were not disappointed - a fine documentary about Chris Blackwell and co. followed by a string of performances from Island artists 'at the BBC'.

Apart from one glaringly appalling performance which has annoyed me SO much I am moved to share it with the world. Be warned, the following paragraphs may contain bad language.


OK - so who has pissed me off so much that I am spending 20 minutes sharing it with the entire planet?

Jools fucking Holland, that's who. I have never been able to stand this nasty greasy little man and I don't understand people who think he is a genius of the piano. He is not. He is a second rate technician. This was more than proven by his performance last night - a clip from the Jools Holland show featuring the mighty Jimmy Cliff. At first I thought 'Hmmmmmm......looks like Jimmy is getting on, I wonder if he can still cut the mustard?' The answer was yes - a truly STUNNING vocal performance, powerful, inventive and one of my favourite ever songs 'Many Rivers to Cross'

Of course it's Jools' show, so he HAS to play the fucking piano. What a FARCE - tinkly little bits all over the fucking show, no sense of light and shade (spaces in music are, to the enlightened, almost more important than the notes themselves) and a lack of sensitivity unmatched since Goebbels heydey. There is poor Jimmy giving a superb performance and having to put up with this slimy self-professed 'genius' arsehole of a man ruining what could have been one of THE great performances - and I mean on a par with Hendrix at Woodstock.

Might I suggest that the powers that be remove both of this snivelling little shit's arms and bury them at opposite ends of the planet.

What a BASTARD.

Any questions?

Current Pain Rating: 0.5

Space Station Cakey Thing

Nothing to do with anything else in this blog, but couldn't resist publishing this picture I took in our garden on Sunday. Click on it to see the full sized image.

Current Pain Rating: 0.5

Hand Jive

My hand is hurting quite badly after last weekends gig. Oh dear. Still they said I couldn't damage it, so I'm guessing it'll recover.

Current Pain Rating: 4

T Minus 12 Hours and Counting

Gig day at last! This evening, I shall be bringing this little beauty out of semi-retirement. Why - long scale length = less string tension = easier bends. Besides that it's pretty and it has 'Gibson' plastered across the headstock which always impresses the natives.

Of course the obligatory Travis Bean will be with me and I will no doubt end up playing that due to it's superior tone and sustain qualities.

I'll let youse know how it goes - should be massive fun and oh so fuckin' loud.

BRING IT ON!

Current Pain Rating: 1

Captain Rock'n'Roll Rides Again

Last night we had our first 'full' electric band rehearsal for ages. It was really an endurance test for me to see how long I could actually play for in one hit and whether it would be long enough to do a gig. I managed two whole hours! Sore thumb this morning, but nothing terrible. So we can start taking bookings again. Hell, it felt SO good to play loud raucous music again and even my Les Dawson style interpretation of 'Delilah' was fun.

Once again dear hearts, lock up your daughters, warn your sons and hide the pies, Cap'n Rock'n'Roll is back!

Current Pain Rating: 1

'Two Sheds' Mulholland

Cath has bought another shed on ebay to put on our recently acquired allotment. Unfortunately it was in Weston-super-Mare and she and Jamie went off to get it in a borrowed Transit van. It wouldn't all fit in, but what did had to be transported by hand right across a huge field to our 'allotted' patch. I mention this because I helped and boy did I hurt the old thumb. It would appear that once again I am running before I can walk. Still the physiotherapist said that I can't actually do any harm to the altered joint, just make it sore - so onwards and upwards!

The hand itself continues to heal well and I can use it almost as if there was never a problem. It's still a little weak and those unison double stop bends on the old geetar are still a bit too difficult but we will get there.

Current Pain Rating: 2

Mission Accomplished

I have just been to see the physiotherapist again and he has given me the all clear to start driving and to go back to work next Monday. I am delighted. Although there is still some pain from the physio exercises, this will fade as the joint gets stronger. So that's that then.

Will I continue to 'blog'? I don't know - I may post thoughts as they occur now and again if i think they are worth sharing, I may not.

Current Pain Rating : 1

Yes I'm Gonna Be A Star.

I came across this picture of my eldest son and one of his best chums on his FaceBook page.

That's my lad out of focus.

But what a BRILLIANT picture!

I believe it was taken very early one morning after an 'interesting' night.

Current Pain Rating: 1

Baby You Can Drive My Car.

Ha, I have eventually got my car back. It's only cost me around £400 extra for my holiday by leaving the carkeys in Sweden! Geoffrey the bass player has just delivered it for me. Trouble is that I am not allowed to drive it. The physio chap said that I should not drive until I have done lots of strengthening exercises and seen him again (on the 3rd of March) for clearance. He said that if I did drive and had to 'grab' the wheel in an emergency all hell could break loose! Also he recommended that I use codeine again for a while as the exercises were likely to hurt like hell. Great, ya just wean yerself off it and then it's back on! Still, it works better now and the medical professional was right - I do need it.

Yesterday I managed a few chords on the guitar - what a great feeling after so long. It was all going really well for a good two minutes until I tried one of my favourite lead licks and nearly went through the roof! Do you know boys and girls, I ACTUALLY swore!

Little and often will be the way forward I think.

It's all good.

To be fair, I have had no arthritic pain whatsoever in the altered joint since the surgery and that in itself is magnificent.

Current Pain Rating: 1 ( 7 after exercises)

Physiotherapy......

............begins today at nine. The old thumb is much, much better, but still quite painful if I move it. I want my car back, I want to play guitar ASAP and I want a big fat brass slide to play it with. Yep, I'm gonna try slide geetar yet again. I reckon poor tools have put me off in the past, so I'm gonna try to find a slide that actually fits my somewhat large pinky and set the SG up properly tuned to open E.

Current Pain Rating: 0.5 - 1 (variable depending upon usage)

Décrocher

Today I have stopped the painkillers - well, the day before yesterday actually when I ran out of codeine.

Welcome to the self dancing legs, hot/cold flushes and flights of bats.

Great.

Watch this space for a full report of the Swedish trip.

Current Pain Rating (hand): 1

That Swedish Trip in Full

OK, fasten your safety belts - this one is gonna be a long haul

The memsahib and I have recently returned from an excellent holiday in Sweden - here is the tale:

Some of the pictures were taken with my phone and are a bit less sharp - sorry! (Remember you can click on the pictures for the big version)

Friday February 6th

We awake early to drive to Stansted airport for the evening flight for Vasteras in Sweden. Having anticipated some snow, I am surprised to find that it has been snowing constantly all night and there are several inches of the white stuff on the ground.

And on the car!

And everywhere - and is is still snowing....HARD!
Possibly the worst weather in the UK for 10 years or more. Great!

Cath is driving and we set off hoping that we can get to a main road which will be clear. There are severe weather warnings for the entire route of our journey and people are advised not to drive unless absolutely necessary. Now the little village of Churchinford where we live is peculiar in that every road out of the village (there are 6) is uphill. The BMW gracefully exits it's parking space and sets off down towards the centre of the village - it's seriously slippy but we are moving.

Mission controller Thrasher decides it would be a good idea to try to get some speed up and take a run at the hill. WRONG! We end up stuck outside the village pub, going sideways with a delighted audience of local folks. After much pushing, shoving digging and head scratching, one of them, Bert gets his big Toyota land cruiser, hooks the BMW to the back of it and of we go with Bert and Crow in the big Toyota and me steering the BMW which is just sliding all over the road, literally flapping about behind the Toyota, which Bert is driving at around 20 mph - it seems like 60 and is a really hard fight to try to steer. I hurt my thumb. Eventually, I put the BMW in neutral and kind of give up on the steering apart from during the worst slides, content to be towed in the manner of an up-market blue snow plough!

After about two miles of this, through deep snow, we meet a man coming the other way on foot who tells us that there is a big tree down across the main road into town. That's that then. There is another road, but we decide that if it is as snowbound as this one, it will be too treacherous to even attempt. We abandon the BMW, transfer the luggage to the Land Cruiser and head for home. When we get back we are told that the other road into town has been ploughed and is passable, so Bert (bless him) decides we will go and have a look. When we get there the road is clear, so we go and hook up the BMW again and Bert tows us to the clear road. Made it. Two and a half hours to do around about three miles.

The next two hundred and thirty miles are easy-peasy, the main roads to town are reasonably clear and the motorways all have two lanes ploughed and are virtually traffic free. We get to Stansted in good time, sort out the mysteries of Ryanairs automated check in and board the jet.

We have to wait for the wings to be de-iced during which time the ground crew go off for a cup of tea and we have to wait for them to come back as well. Then the good bit - taking off - I seriously LOVE this experience - always have, always will - it's a power thing - if I could shoehorn a Rolls Royce jet into a bike frame I would (yes, I know it's been done.)


Nice flight to Sweden, lands about 50 minutes late and we are met by our friend Jane, driven back to her place through the snow and to a nice cup of tea and a nicer warm bed.

Saturday February 7th

Up early for the 100km drive to Stockholm where Jane has to go to work for a couple of hours and Cath and I do some sightseeing and have lunch.

They have pointy buildings.....................

............HUGE pubs (actually, it's a department store).....................

.....................big boats with a front that comes off.......................

...............nice people giving away free hot blueberry soup.............. ..................icebergs in the river................................

.................and, of course, pygmy ponies.

I searched everywhere for a dental floss bush, but there were none to be found!

In the evening we party with our friends - we are celebrating Gorans 50th birthday and there are all sorts of people there - robot scientists, teachers, nuclear physicists, some from Blighty others from South Africa, most from Vasteras itself. Its a great party with excellent food provided by Jane and her mum and daughter.

About halfway through, a slightly worse for wear Catherine whispers in my ear 'Ern, they are all putting their keys in a pot by the door.............and I haven't got any keys - what will I do, I'll be left with the dregs.'

Poor girl has mistaken the house key stash for a swingers party vessel and is quite peturbed. Our fellow party go-ers kindly explain that without keys you can't join in - pisstaking bastards!

Take note of this key pot, it appears again later in the tale!

Things wind down about 3 a.m and the locals get on their bikes to pedal precariously home in a blizzard.

Sunday 8th February

Today the Swedish contingent have hangovers. Cath and I don't, she because she went to bed fairly early and slept it off, me because I took it easy and am dropping so much codeine that a hangover never has even the slightest look in.

We rise late and go for a walk around the local area in a blizzard with temperatures of -10. Quite refreshing. Then back to the house to feast on party food for Sunday dinner followed by an early night.

Monday 9th February

Up early to travel to the farm in the wilderness where we are to spend the day and the night experiencing life in the Swedish outback! A long train journey through Uppsala and Gavle then on to Soderhamn where our host meets us in her car. The roads are ice with a thin covering of snow, but these machines have superb winter tyres and within the hour we have made the 40 km journey to the farm.

It is stunningly beautiful and after being shown to our room , unpacking and having coffee with hardbread and home made honey (yes, they keep bees here!), it's off for a sleighride.

It gets dark early, although it's hard to tell as there is a very bright full moon. Cath and I get dressed for a ramble in the snow and to maybe chase down some owls (or at least hear them).

The snow is beautiful at night and we are out for much longer than we thought in temperatures of around -15. We don't really notice as we are enjoying it so much. Our hosts Åsa and Lasse swear they can distinguish the northern lights on the horizon, but that the full moon is masking them. I'm not so sure, but we had a good time trying to convince ourselves that we had seen them.

Tuesday 10th February

We leave the farm around 10ish after a breakfast of boiled eggs, ham, toast, honey and strong hot coffee. Ace!
Another 40 km drive to Jarvso, a small Ski resort which also has a zoo full of the local animals. It is -20 here, colder than your freezer, but not painful as we are well wrapped up and it is 'dry' cold.

The zoo is under about 10 inches of snow and some of the animals are hiding/hibernating (the bears), but we get to see Elk, Wolves, Wolverines (in the distance) and lots of birds of prey.

It is pretty cold after a couple of hours, but the ever thoughtful Swedes provide a 'resthut' halfway round with a fire and tables and candles where Cath is able to toast her freezing feet. We leave the zoo when it closes at 3 pm and head for the cafe-bar where we have left our luggage. We have 3 hours to kill before we catch the train back to Vasteras and we spend it drinking beer, glogg with pepparkakor and eating salmon and beef steaks.

Then it's back to the station to catch the train.

Back in Vasteras Jane picks us up at the station. It is late and the family are all in bed, so we have a glass of wine, a chat and retire.

Wednesday 11th February

Today is a day for relaxing and flying home. Jane and Goran are at work, Cath goes off to the shops to get supplies for the evening meal ( I decline the walk in the snow due to a minor 'nocturnal' back injury incurred at the farm) and I do a little blogging and some remedial work on Janes laptop - virus protection and that sort of stuff. We eat a splendid meal of fresh tomatoes, olives, garlic and pasta and then it's off to the airport for the 9 o'clock flight.

Another entertaining take-off and a jolly bouncy landing causing some of the passengers to grunt with fear and we are back in Blighty. Through customs (without declaring the cheese and aquavit), pick up the bags and on to the transfer bus for the car park. It is cold and damp and generally pretty miserable and we can't wait to get in the warm car.

EXCEPT: I have left the f*cking car keys in Vasteras. Oh yes I have - in the 'swingers' keypot where Cath insisted I put them for safekeeping while we are at the farm (a fu*king day late into the pot if they had been swingers!). There are a few glares as we come to the realisation that we both bear an element of blame, but no harsh words - too shocked to row about it. After behaving like headless chickens for half an hour, we eventually go back to the airport and book an extremely expensive room at the neighbouring Radisson SAS Hotel.

Luckily they have free superfast wi-fi internet for guests and I get my phone hooked up and start costing solutions. By 4 am we have decided that I should not fly back and get the keys, but have them sent over and hire a car to get home, picking up my car later. Next morning, we have the BEST breakfast ever and then pick up a Honda Jazz from the Avis car hire company and set off. Arriving back at Smokey Cottage we are desperate for a nice cup of tea. Guess what? Nobody home and no house keys (they are in Sweden too!). Luckily Jamie the son is not far away and a phone call and a short drive afford us the means to enter our own house.

And there ya have it. Elephants never forget!

Current Pain Rating: 1

Safe European Home

Hi there hordes of fans and admirers that want to ..............touch my clothes.

I haven't posted for a while as I am currently resident in Sweden and I've been relaxing and having loads of fun.

We have been staying with friends in Vasteras, a large city around 100 km from Stockholm. The day before yesterday we went for a night on a B&B farm here which was tremendous fun. We went kick sledging and sleigh riding and had moose soup for supper (very tasty).

The temperature was -20 C. This is colder than your deep freeze at home which typically runs at -18 C.

I'll post a full report when I get back to England in the next few days.

Current Pain Rating: 1 (3 if it's VERY cold)

Ouch!

Banged me thumb quite hard today and it hurts like hell.
Still, I'll eat a few more painkillers.
Off to party on down in Vasteras tomorrow - I will report from there.

Current Pain Rating: 7

Nothing is Happening..............

.............or so sayeth the title of a late period song by magical Welsh prog rockers 'Man'

I mention that because I have been reminded of the Welsh prog rock scene by a pal talking about 'Black Hole Star' an album by Man offshoot 'The Neutrons'. Same chap was bemoaning the loss of many stars of the old days during his recent extended holiday in NZ. Researching the Neutrons I came across a page detailing lots of 'where are they now' info on acts of the 60's and 70's. One page of said site had links to obituaries and due to a morbid interest in who has popped their clogs recently, I had a quick shuftie.I was quite sad to discover that one of my closest brushes with the big time (ever) has died last year.

Once upon a time, many, many moons ago, I was playing a gig with a very early incarnation of my current band in a seedy seaside dive in Westward-Ho! As we were sound checking a balding and diminuative hippy-ish looking chap came in, listened to the band intently for some minutes and when we had finished came over and introduced himself. "Hi, my name is Brian, I really like the band, you sound cool, would you mind if I sat in on drums on a couple of numbers?" Well, ya get a lot of this in a working band, so I pointed him at the drummer who had a chat, let him have a knockabout and decided he was up to the task. So we let him sit in on a couple of blues standards. While we were playing another local muso friend came in. At the end of the set he asked me if I knew who the mystery drummer was and I said "Yes, that's Brian, he's a nice guy and not a bad drummer - go have a chat to him". My chum said "Yes that is Brian, Brian Davison of 'The Nice'!

The Nice, of course, were one of the first recognised 'prog' bands in the UK and Brian was their highly able drummer. And so the circle closes, prog rock to prog rock, and one of my best 'brush with the greats' stories is told.

RIP Brian


















As for my hand - well that is healing just fine - not allowed to move my thumb yet, but no sign of the arthritic pain that constantly dogged me before the surgery - looking good then.

Current Pain Rating: 1

Sweet Grace & Danger

I haven't posted for a few days. Why? Because I managed to trap or bruise a nerve in my left shoulder and it's ruined my sleep patterns, waking me up at all hours of the night and thus causing me to feel very tired and not a little grumpy. Last night I slept all night (well, until 5 a.m. which is good). My hand is continuing to heal well, still pretty painful if I attempt to use it, which I shouldn't but sometimes a chap just can't help it. I have no arthritic pain in what's left of that joint at all - so looking good then.

I have always loved rock music and guitar playing in particular. Recently a mate of mine brought to my attention the sad demise of Davy Graham - a folk artist with whom I was not really familiar, at least that's what I thought until I checked out his website and listened to some of his stuff at which point I discovered that he was familiar to me, I just didn't know it. Of course a lot of the people that were/are my musical heroes have had personal demons to battle in their lives and often this has brought about an early death. Yesterday one of the real greats left us. If you want to know why musicians battle those demons check this out:



Thanks John.

Current Pain Rating: 3

The Human Body is a Wonderful Thing

Here we are roughly three weeks post op the scar is fading fast and the hairs are growing back.




I still have to wear the splint most of the time, but I am allowed to remove it to 'air' the surgery site for up to two hours a day. Still getting some weird sensations and minor pain from inside the joint, presumably this is where scar tissue is forming. It's still pretty painful if (by mistake) I move it, but things are well on the mend.

Blinking shoulder is giving me trouble still, but what the hey, it seems to be improving slowly.

Next hurdle? The codeine habit. Oh joy!

Current Pain Rating: 1 for the thumb and 4 for the shoulder makes 5.

The Ladies of the Orchestra

Last night my pals from the band came round to visit. Fantastic guys, all of 'em and I love 'em to bits. Geoffrey gave me a big hairy kiss (no tongues) when he arrived - lovely, lovely man. I still have a slight tumescence. We had a good old chat and before long decamped to the local pub. I think we probably multiplied their takings for the evening 10-fold! Anyway, if you read this guys, thanks for coming to see me, the hangover wasn't too bad at all.

The hand is much the same today - it's not good to take the splint off, but otherwise healing just fine. My shoulder kept me up again last night but seems to be getting better, probably because of the mountain of ibuprofen that I have gotten through today.

Current Pain Rating: 3

Minor Disaster

My hand is healing well - not a great deal of pain at all as long as I keep the splint on. The orthotics operative at the hospital that made the splint told me that I could take it off for up to 2 hours a day if I want to. I don't want to. It feels SO weird if I do - oddly, just like someone has chopped out my thumb joint. And the slightest knock or twist is still very painful. I'm guessing that this is because there is scar tissue forming in the void where the trapezium used to be.

The problem today is that I seem to have trapped or bruised a nerve in my left shoulder. This is causing me quite a lot of pain even when the arm is static. Any regular folks out there who might wear a tennis shoe or an occasional python boot and have experienced this exquisite little inconvenience know just how painful it can be.

Consequently, I have been awake most of the night and currently feel quite zombiefied. Despite my best attempts not to disturb Mrs. Thrasher, I'm afraid I did and the poor thing has had to go to work feeling rather sleepy.

I'm hoping that this is the low spot of the whole experience, but there is physiotherapy to come yet.

Current Pain Rating: 3 for the hand and 7 for the shoulder makes 10.

Progress

Today I went and had my stitches out - like this:

Step 1: remove the outer layer of post operative dressings



Step 2: remove the inner layer of post operative dressing



and voila, the wound is exposed in all it's glory along with the (extremely neat) stitches - thanks Mr. Clarke



Step 3: remove stitches (repeat 7 times)



Step 4: add 1 small dressing and 1 large splint and don't move thumb for another 4 weeks.

I have to say that it was all completely painless apart from when the woman that made the splint squeezed my thumb a little too hard. Of course I just HAD to have a tentative wiggle of the joint in the car on the way home. By Golly I wish I hadn't - it is really quite tender.

Nice neat job though eh?

Current Pain Rating: 3

You Won't Feel a Thing..............

Today the stitches come out and I get some new kind of dressing/splint and possibly start physiotherapy too. Slightly nervous about stitches coming out, but looking forward to having this huge lump of bandages, steel and plaster removed. I'll let you know how it goes.

Current Pain Rating: 4

Chairman of the Bored

BORED!
I am bored, despite the tasks that Mrs Thrasher has set me, there are still vast swathes of the day that are empty. Granted there is the TV, but how many old romantic comedies or episodes of the Jeremy Kyle show can one man stomach. In the latter case, the answer is one half!

My hand seems to be doing OK - looking forward to having the stitches removed on Monday. Most of the pain now would appear to be post operative - I can definitely tell someone has been at me with an osteotome and I think that I may also have the biggest paper cut you ever did see (at least it feels that way).

Current Pain Rating: 4

It's All a Bit Boring Really

Not much to report at the moment I'm afraid. The hand seems a little better - the spasms seem to have calmed down a lot, but now I can really feel where they have sliced through the flesh. Uncomfortable, but not unbearable.

At least I have something to look forward to - a short break in Sweden with Cath. We will visit friends in Vasteras then have a night on a farm style B&B with a sleighride. The following day, it's off to the local wildlife park to tease the wolverines.

This type of wolverine










not this type - even I wouldn't be daft enough to pull faces at one of these!











Current Pain Rating: 6

Once More Into the Void.

At least one reader has expressed slight confusion at what has actually happened to my thumb joint.

Righto then, inside the wrist/thumb joint there are several bones, one of which is called the trapezium and looks like this:

In my poor old hand, this bone had become deformed due to the action of osteo-arthritis, a nasty little disease that attacks bone causing it to develop 'spurs' and also holes in the bone. There are several ways of dealing with this from the medical practitioners point of view, in the early stages supportive splints can bring relief from the pain. Later on in the progress of the disease injections of steroids into the synovial capsule of the joint can reduce swelling and give relief. I had around three years of these treatments (hypodermic right through the back of the hand anyone? I thought not!) Eventually the medic/patient may opt for surgery to remove the troublesome bone.

Again there are several possible methods of doing this, some of which involve replacing the trapezium with cartilage harvested from somewhere else in the body or even inserting metal pins to hold things together. In my case the consultant used a technique which removes the trapezium bone and leaves a void where it used to be. This void naturally fills with scar tissue and the joint (after much physiotherapy) returns to around 90 - 95 % of it's original strength and mobility. Plenty enough for those overdriven Chuck Berry licks then although I was warned that I would probably never be able to emulate the styles of Mr. Vai or Mr. Satriani. So you see, there are some VERY positive aspects to the whole thing.

So, to sum up here are before and after x-rays - not mine I hasten to add - the medical profession regard any data about, or surplus parts of ones body as their own - they wouldn't even give me the bone to make a necklace out of. In fairness, this was because they didn't actually take it out in one nice hit like in the video at the beginning of this blog, rather removing it in little bits with a chisel.









Now ya see it................ Now ya don't.

Got that? There will be a test next week.

Current Pain Rating: 6

Poppa Has Been on a Small Vacation Honey.................

Howdy folks,

Here we are back in the land of the living and feeling pretty good. I had the operation at about 2:00 on Tuesday afternoon and for some reason it took almost twice as long as they expected (big hands?) They gave me a nice side room off the ward all to myself.

Contrary to what they had told me, the anaesthetist decided that I would have a general as opposed to a local anaesthetic. His polite teutonic explanation of the reason for this was 'You are a strong man', which I took to mean that they didn't want me thrashing round the theatre if they accidentally touched a nerve in the site of the surgery. My concern was that I get out of the place ASAP and he said that I would still be able to go home the same day. OK bud, you got yourself a deal!

After the deed was done they wheeled me back to my room where Cathy and Jamie were waiting to take the obligatory photo. I felt pretty good but looking at the photo, I think I may have been just a tad bolloxed! What do you think?

After several successful rounds of vital signs observations, they let me out at around 8:15 in the evening, supplying me with a pack each of Voltarol, Tramadol and pure Codeine. By 9:15, believe me, I was in no pain whatsoever and was the owner of a splendidly fashioned sling support (made from a mic stand) and a very satisfied facial expression.

Sleeping the first night was a bit of a no-no, just too much pain despite throwing as many opiates as I dared down my neck. Yesterday too was pretty painful and I spent the day in a bit of a haze, not really doing much at all.

Last night after a day guzzling painkillers, I slept really well, only one incident at around midnight where I had some kind of spasm in the altered thumb. Now that did hurt, but as soon as it stopped I was able to get back to sleep and stay that way until 10 this morning.

Currently, I have a big splint and heavy bandaging and all is quite comfortable - so much so that I have not needed to take any pain relief at all today.

Looking good then.

Current Pain Rating: 4